I just got off a brief escapade into the internet.
As much as I'd love to be free from it altogether, now and again I am forced to hunt down the internet box plug amidst the socks, where we keep it, plug it in and go online for some “important” business. Normally this important business involves uploading files to our website or YouTube, sending instructions to our team, checking essential emails or buying stuff on Amazon.
Once the Wi-Fi is on, I notice I become a slightly different version of myself. A less conscious, more stressed and agitated being. It's similar to what happens if I drink too much coffee or become dehydrated. The wired-in Michael is not the same as the unplugged Michael.
Unplugged Michael tends to be more relaxed, more present and more aware of life's blessings.
Wired Michael spends his time searching, searching, searching for something. Obsessively and often impatiently wanting to finish whatever is going on. It needs to be done. Now.
He is not interested in what is going on around him and seems to spend more time than needed doing random things not related to what he went online for in the first place, like checking stats, checking emails and going on YouTube.
The effect of the internet seems to put me into a more grasping and dissatisfied state. After a day online, or even a few hours online, I feel markedly disturbed. I feel infected. Like a strange illness has come over me.
Seeing all the ads and images, and clicking away on endless tabs and websites, seems to put my mind and body into a restless state that is dissatisfied and yet wants more and more, like a hungry ghost.
At other times in my life I've spent hours watching videos on YouTube or Vimeo. No matter how many videos I see, I always feel like I need more. Same with movies, Facebook and shopping. It's both too much and not enough.
After my online binges I rarely, if ever, feel satisfied and peaceful. I need time to heal.
Sadly, if the internet and cell obsession is an ongoing thing, that healing never happens and the infection grows and grows and grows.
The hungry ghost always wants more and never gets enough.
Michael has spent much of his working life online—and much of the rest of it trying to stop that technology taking over. He has thrown a phone into a lake, locked devices in boxes and experimented with long periods offline. He writes about what helped, what failed and how to keep the useful parts of digital life.