Kauai · April 2025

Before I Even Posted Anything

I arrived on the island determined to create some content that would inspire people and promote my work on Instagram. I had a month to do it.

Under normal conditions, I refuse to touch Instagram with a long stick. But I decided if I was to use this app, I should download it and start scrolling so at least I could see what other content is out there.

It was a science project. A research mission.

Within the first few seconds I felt both shocked, awed and hooked.

Within an hour, I felt overwhelmed, insecure and needy. I saw how much better other creators were doing than me. At a certain point I stopped ignoring the ads and started clicking on them.

All ads about how to make viral content. The secret to get rich on Instagram. How I got 250K followers in a month and how you can too.

I was already altered by that point. The trance had settled in nicely. I bought one course, then another, then another.

They all said the same thing. Please the algorithm. Find out what others are doing and copy them. Use clever hooks. Reward people in the first three seconds or less.

I went from curiosity to a feeling of lack and prostituting myself to the lords of the algorithm. Without knowing it I was starting to learn how to create the exact variable rewards loonie loop content that got me trapped. Because that's what is rewarded.

I felt fundamentally off kilter, as if I was standing on one leg carrying a large box of bananas.

And that's before I even posted anything.